Post by pz on Jan 30, 2008 11:01:01 GMT -5
"Ladies and Gentlemen: I present to you the president of Westerbergia . . . PZ!!"
Raucous applause & cheering.
"Fellow Westerbergians, I am here to talk to you about the state of our land, and I am here to tell you that the state of this Union is strong!"
Wild cheering and rapturous clapping.
"And I am cautiously optimistic about the outlook for next year!"
“Woo hoo!” “Yes!” “Yeah baby!”
"We have healed our national wounds like a scab covering a vicious screwdriver puncture to the palm of the hand!"
Some clapping, several “ummmm”s.
"But we must be prepared to make some sacrifices to continue on this prosperous course!"
Several pins drop.
"This is not a time for luxuries – therefore we must continue to be satisfied with a drum machine rather than a living breathing skinthumper."
Grumbling
"And we will have to accept generic spray paint to use on our suits."
Hiss.
"And we must make decisions that will not always please us all."
“Huh?”
“Uh oh.”
"First, we must build a wall to keep out members from the Wang Chung message board."
Wild applause.
Angry shouting.
"But we will offer temporary member status to those from the Bob Seger board who are already here."
“BOOOO!!!”
“RIGHT ON!”
"We will offer a generous tax refund to all those with over 1000 posts."
General agreement.
"And we will double the tax on all administrators and moderators."
A few profanities escape the crowd.
"In short, we will do what we need to do, what we always do, to keep the Union of Westerbergia strong, prosperous, and filled with lendable hair spray! Thank you and good night!!"
