Fairy armchair backseat Monday morning manager

[cellarfullofnoise]

You can be Paul Westerberg's manager at any point in his career. You get one chance to suggest/decide something and he will follow your instructions to the letter.

When and what and why?

[Placemat]

Don't count any of my advice.

[justlikemartinsaid]

Let me preface by saying I love Paul, and I only want the best for him. And honestly, in the short term, this would help him the most:

When: this week
What: get your teeth capped
Why: because too many people have an aversion to people with bad teeth.

I'm not talking choppers, ala Matt Dillon in There's Something About Mary, but anything's better than the rotted tooth look.

After that, I would encourage some sort of live TV show, like Austin City Limits, maybe a few TV guest appearances with other artists in the same vein.

And the biggest thing I would suggest is marketing directly to the core fanbase. Although we may not number enough to garner gold record-selling albums every release, there are enough of us that would pay money at the drop of a hat for live shows on audio and video, no matter how well or poorly-produced it might be. I personally think that his fanbase is and will always be somewhat limited in numbers, but I know that we would support him more sales-wise if given the opportunity with more product. I would buy pretty much anything that he put out there...

[ih8music]

Record an album with HOF, right away.

Live or studio - doesn't matter. these guys bring a vibe to his songs that has been missing since, well, you know when. Especially Mr. ERB.

[paulie]

1st and most importantly don't build a neverland and start serving jesus juice, it's career suicide.
keep doing what your doing. your music, your integrity, your fans will always be there.
every now and then throw the masses a bone. you know you can write a chartable hit. just do it to keep them wondering what they're missing.
keep up the new wave off album covers and you'll end up on GQ.

[randolph500]

When: this week
What: get your teeth capped
Why: because too many people have an aversion to people with bad teeth.

In England we think Paul is a representative from the great american fluoride God because our teeth are, believe me, far far worse.

[snickers]

[Caroline]

----

I must agree that he should get his teeth fixed - the decayed look is not helping. Doesn't have to be perfect - just natural and not black. I suspect he's waiting for them to fall out and has no intention of replacing them.

[angela]

I'm floored to hear that PW has bad teeth. I never noticed.

I guess the Mono cover should have given me an idea.

I love in that episode of the Simpsons when they show the progression of Lisa's teeth and the last one has them coming out of her head like spikes.

[thetwilitekid]

angela said:

I'm floored to hear that PW has bad teeth. I never noticed.

I guess the Mono cover should have given me an idea.

I thought he had made them black on purpose for Grandpaboy, like eating black licorice or something before.

[SnowCover]

"He'd be half handsome if it weren't for those teeth!" - My friend Caitlin

[angela]

thetwilitekid said:

I thought he had made them black on purpose for Grandpaboy, like eating black licorice or something before.

Well that was what I thought until now.

*waits for someone to yell "why the hell are we talking about Paul's dental hygiene!?!?!"*

[cellarfullofnoise]

I'd go back to 2003 and advise PW not to put the original version of Crackle and Drag on CFMT. I like it, and I thought it was cool to have both when the record came out, but now I feel like the original would be better as a B side or a cool unreleased track on Besterberg.

[A Regular]

cellarfullofnoise said:

I'd go back to 2003 and advise PW not to put the original version of Crackle and Drag on CFMT. I like it, and I thought it was cool to have both when the record came out, but now I feel like the original would be better as a B side or a cool unreleased track on Besterberg.

Speaking of which, play the rocking version live already, ok?

In fact, if I was the manager I'd tell PW to let this A Regular guy design the outline of the setlist each night.

[bigbak]

This is tougher than it looks. I'm approaching it seriously, and it is quite a challenge. I truly believe the 'mats would have benifited greatly from better production early on, but I also believe that the sound they put out is what made them so uniquely them - I'd hate to lose that.

It's one of those Twilight Zone conundrums wherein you are able to change one thing in the past supposedly for the better - say, kill Hitler before he rises to power - and it comes out horribly wrong.

[timtoast]

Manager : "Hey Paul, you might want to get Bob to lay off that Heroin. "

Paul: "Good idea, I'll go tell him right now. I'd sure miss him if he wasn't around. Hey, what do you think of naming an album "Suicaine Gratification"?"

Manager: ".....you're kidding, right?"

[deebee76]

Manager: Paul, record and release some material with your only friends.

Paul: Okay.

[Strange and Grandiose]

cellarfullofnoise said:

You can be Paul Westerberg's manager at any point in his career. You get one chance to suggest/decide something and he will follow your instructions to the letter.

When and what and why?

Suggestion #1

When:
1995 (when the critics were still on your side)

What: Acknowledge someone younger than yourself who was obviously inspired by you. My personal preference is for Jeff Tweedy/Wilco, but there's a ton to choose from (and even more 10 years ago).

Why:
The interest of a younger generation of fans would have been piqued. You would've sold more records. You wouldn't have had reason to be depressed and reclusive between Suicaine and Mono. We wouldn't have had to wait so long for new music from you between those albums.

Suggestion #2:

When:
As soon as possible.

What:
Cover "Respectable" and/or "Don't Sleep in the Subway" the next show I'm at, or on the next record.

Why:

It would make me happy. "Happy" would be a good cover, too, come to think of it.

[ElegantMule]

angela said:

*waits for someone to yell "why the hell are we talking about Paul's dental hygiene!?!?!"*

That would be me. Thanks for doing it for me.

[scoOter]

i absolutely second the suggestions about recording with his only friends, and doing austin city limits or vh1 storytellers.