Boy who cried "benefit"

[Strange and Grandiose]

I've been listening to Suicaine Gratifaction (awfully titled but underrated album). What does "boy who cried benefit" mean in "Self Defense"? This has bugged me for years.

[kgp]

I think I read this one the Skyway a long time ago. Maybe "benefits" refers to a giving in to a stable job with benefits as apposed to staying true to your artistic roots.

[TomT]

I've never grasped the lyrics to that song. Lines like "Careful don't you spill your dinner" have me baffled.

Self-Defense
------Paul Westerberg

Cheekbones and hormones
Your only self-defense
Lying through dinner
And your rock and roll teeth again
You've harbored a coward
Fed him full of broth
This nocturnal sadness
Leave you pale as this tablecloth
Careful don't you spill your dinner
That would be a good defense
Then you wouldn't have to sit here
On the fence

Cheekbones and hormones
He's the accidental man
Tell you in a stage whisper
about the boy who cried benefit
As the poet drags the darkness
Within him to the light
It's only in self-defense
That they drag you out into the night
Careful don't you spill your dinner
That would be your best defense
Careful what you wish for

An idiot and a genius
Standing up to dine
Breaking manmade laws
Cause I only follow those that are divine
And only when you're chased
Do you ever run fast
And it's wrong to commit a suicide
It's only in self-defense

[headlightbeams]

just thinking out loud:
- the boy who cried wolf repeatedly warned when there was no true problem, just for kicks; then no help arrives when real trouble comes
- suicide attempts often seen more as warnings than true attempts
- "benefit" in a performing context (stage whisper, rock and roll teeth) = performance to help someone in need
- so "the boy who cried benefit" could be someone who fakes trouble (or tries suicide) to get others to help him.

Then there's "chased/chaste" in that other line towards the end ...

[kgp]

riverr said:

just thinking out loud:
- the boy who cried wolf repeatedly warned when there was no true problem, just for kicks; then no help arrives when real trouble comes
- suicide attempts often seen more as warnings than true attempts
- "benefit" in a performing context (stage whisper, rock and roll teeth) = performance to help someone in need
- so "the boy who cried benefit" could be someone who fakes trouble (or tries suicide) to get others to help him.

Then there's "chased/chaste" in that other line towards the end ...

That works. Also, I think of it as someone sitting at the dinner table (or maybe being wined and dined by some hotshot record exec.) and being asked "What's wrong?" "Nothing." (But thinking, "None of your damn business, now get the hell out of my face.")

The whole album lends itself to over-analysis, so I'll shut up now.

(I do like "Self Defense," but he tried a little too hard to make "art.")

[A Regular]

tomt said:

I've never grasped the lyrics to that song. Lines like "Careful don't you spill your dinner" have me baffled.

This is probably the too simple take on spilling your dinner as defense, but I pictured an awkward dinner table with spouse when you are supposed to talk about things, sometimes uncomfortable things, and by spilling something the conversation would have to stop for clean-up and which allows you to escape the conversation in self defense. I think its a small scale example of screwing something up so you don't have to face the larger issue, but not as drastic as standing on the ledge.

[Strange and Grandiose]

I agree with kgp that he was trying a little too hard on this song.

I seem to remember an interview from around the time the album was released in which he said that parts of the song (cheekbones, spilling dinner) referred to a friend with an eating disorder. It's possible that this was just my or a friend's speculation at the time as to what the song was about, but I'm pretty sure I read it somewhere, and I think it was an interview.

This is a frustrating album to listen to in places, Self Defense being the most obvious example. Looking Out Forever is mostly brilliant. In a recent thread on this board, someone posted the "taste me in his kisses, waste me in my prime, replace me with another..." line as his best post-mats lyric, and (depending on when you ask me) I would agree with that. But the chorus is just "Looking out forever now I love you now forever now" ad nauseum. He could've spent another five minutes on it and had a perfect song.

I really like Fugitive Kind, too (especially "ain't got time for you to grab your stuff / what's flowing through our veins is good enough"), but "I feel like Billy the Kid" drives me nuts. There are lots of examples of this throughout that album.

[kgp]

lurdnorgins said:

I agree with kgp that he was trying a little too hard on this song.

I seem to remember an interview from around the time the album was released in which he said that parts of the song (cheekbones, spilling dinner) referred to a friend with an eating disorder. It's possible that this was just my or a friend's speculation at the time as to what the song was about, but I'm pretty sure I read it somewhere, and I think it was an interview.

Wow. I never heard that. The only evidence (at least to my knowledge) that "Self Defense" wasn't completely autobiographical was in another interview from about the same time. I think he said something like he's definitely at the center of it, but parts of it could be about his sister too.

[Strange and Grandiose]

kgp said:

lurdnorgins said:

I agree with kgp that he was trying a little too hard on this song.

I seem to remember an interview from around the time the album was released in which he said that parts of the song (cheekbones, spilling dinner) referred to a friend with an eating disorder. It's possible that this was just my or a friend's speculation at the time as to what the song was about, but I'm pretty sure I read it somewhere, and I think it was an interview.

Wow. I never heard that. The only evidence (at least to my knowledge) that "Self Defense" wasn't completely autobiographical was in another interview from about the same time. I think he said something like he's definitely at the center of it, but parts of it could be about his sister too.

Maybe this was what I read way back when (last paragraph is the relevant one):

Paul Westerberg Goes It Alone With Suicaine Gratifaction

Former Replacements leader says his upcoming third solo album may be his most heartfelt.

by Contributing Editor Colin Devenish

Paul Westerberg recorded and plays most of everything on Suicaine Gratifaction. (Kevin Estrada)


Paul Westerberg hasn't sworn off working with a band entirely, but as he recorded the 12 songs for Suicaine Gratifaction it became clear to the singer/songwriter that this latest batch were meant to be played solo.

"There's no question in my mind that I wouldn't have wanted anyone else around making this kind of music," Westerberg said, of the songs from his Feb. 23 release. "This was the most solo thing I've ever done. I recorded and played most of everything and engineered and mixed a lot of it."

Teaming with ubiquitous producer Don Was (Rolling Stones, Bob Dylan, Iggy Pop), the 39-year-old former leader of power-pop pioneers the Replacements continued in the pensive direction of his 1996 LP Eventually, which featured such introspective songs as "Love Untold" (RealAudio excerpt) and "These Are the Days" (RealAudio excerpt).

Blending such moody piano ballads as "Self-Defense" and "Sunrise Always Listens" with out-and-out rock songs, including "Lookin' Out Forever" and "Final Hurrah," Suicaine Gratifaction finds Westerberg trotting out the songwriting tricks he's learned over the years.

"I just find the songs people hold dearest are the ones I don't edit. I'm anticipating, on this one, there's going to be quite a few," Westerberg said. "There were a lot of these that were just right from the heart: 'It's a Wonderful Lie' and 'Bookmark,' which sounds like it was labored over [but] was nothing of the kind."

Despite playing most of the instruments himself, Westerberg did get help from Grammy-winning singer/songwriter Shawn Colvin, who provides backing vocals on the acoustic "Born for Me"; keyboardist Benmont Tench (Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers); and Soul Asylum singer/guitarist Dave Pirner, who sang backup on one track.

Westerberg first stumbled into prominence in the 1980s as frontman for raucous indie rockers the Replacements, recording eight albums with the Minneapolis-based band. Their songs ranged in sound from the frantic punk of "Tommy Gets His Tonsils Out" to the romantic ache of "Within Your Reach." The foursome broke up in 1991.

Was -- who had wanted to work with Westerberg since using the singer's 1993 album 14 Songs as his daily inspiration while producing the Rolling Stones' Voodoo Lounge -- said the singer/songwriter hasn't lost a beat.

"I think he's truly at the peak of his form. The thing that kept going through my mind every time he came up with an idea was, 'F---, what a great idea. To work with John Lennon in his prime wouldn't be any better than this,' " Was said.

"A lot of times musicians look to producers for answers to questions. Unless he was really stuck there was no point in my saying anything. His ideas were always better than mine."

While "Bookmark" came nearly instantaneously, Westerberg said other tunes like "Self-Defense" -- which describes an uncomfortable dinner setting -- kicked around a while before fully taking shape.

"I'd worked a couple years on that melody and I don't know how I ended up with that line of lyric," Westerberg said. "I think I took the title first and wrote the song to it. It had to do with anorexia and suicide -- the usual uplifting stuff."

www.vh1.com/artists/news/511869/02021999/westerberg_paul.jhtml

[Rene']

lurdnorgins said:

This is a frustrating album to listen to in places, Self Defense being the most obvious example. Looking Out Forever is mostly brilliant. In a recent thread on this board, someone posted the "taste me in his kisses, waste me in my prime, replace me with another..." line as his best post-mats lyric, and (depending on when you ask me) I would agree with that. But the chorus is just "Looking out forever now I love you now forever now" ad nauseum. He could've spent another five minutes on it and had a perfect song.

"), but "I feel like Billy the Kid" drives me nuts. There are lots of examples of this throughout that album.

I thought I heard a F*ck you now forever in there, too

[A Regular]

rk442 said:

I thought I heard a F*ck you now forever in there, too

If its not in there, it should be,

[FreeRider]

I know a lot of folks don't like SG, but I like it and especially Self Defense a lot. But I always thought, "careful, don't you spill your dinner" was about a liquid dinner, ie, spilling your cocktails.

I also thought Paul said somewhere that some songs, even he doesn't quite know what they're about. I think he said that about "Runaway Wind", that it was possibly about his dad but he wasn't sure. Maybe Self Defense is one of them too? I mean, it's pretty abstract and you can interpret lots of things about it.

[Strange and Grandiose]

unsatisfied2 said:

rk442 said:

I thought I heard a F*ck you now forever in there, too

If its not in there, it should be,

It is. It helps, a little.

[TomT]

freerider said:

I know a lot of folks don't like SG, but I like it and especially Self Defense a lot. But I always thought, "careful, don't you spill your dinner" was about a liquid dinner, ie, spilling your cocktails.

Knowing now that the song is about anorexia and suicide I think the dinner line might be about trying to dump the food or hide it so it appears they have eaten. Anorexia is a very bad thing indeed.